Category Archives: Family

How relationships (mine in particular) can be so maddening and fulfilling at the same time is certainly a mystery. For the past several months, my partner has been under a great deal of stress, and I have struggled to try and support him by listening and offering advice. Unfortunately, even though we have a great relationship, I have not always come across as completely sympathetic even though I am. I chalk up my sometimes callus-sounding responses (to his ears) to my Irish heritage and an emotional disconnect that I cannot explain. Fortunately, we have been together for quite awhile so he does know that I love him deeply and only want to see him happy.

Part of the breakdown in our communication stems from the fact that I am not a psychiatrist and sometimes fail to articulate my feelings in a helpful manner. But in my defense, it is very difficult when you feel powerless to help someone you care about, and lately I’ve felt completely exasperated. All I can do is offer a sympathetic ear and let him know that I support and love him. However, sometimes that just does not seem to be enough. Do I sound morose? I don’t mean to be. I’m just rambling again.

Today is my father’s birthday. In addition to being one of the best father’s any kid could ever hope to be blessed to have, he is a wonderful person and loving grandfather. The older I become, the more I use my father as a measure of the man I want to become.

Happy birthday Dad – I love you more than I can adequately express in words.

I received a call from a cousin who I rarely get a chance to see mostly because of schedules and geography. However on a whim he called because he will be in Boston for a few days. Unfortunately, I’ll be in NYC all day tomorrow so I will only be able to see him for breakfast on Thursday before he heads out of town.

His call gave me pause to consider how many people I know are lucky enough to have such close connections with so many family members. This cousin who I refer to has never been someone I saw regularly, but we both share a family bond that we mutually respect and no matter how much time passes or how infrequent our meetings, I always am excited to see him or one of his siblings.

I wish I could add something more philosophical or capture some elusive thought that would make this entry in my blog stand out. But the simple fact is knowing I will see him on Thursday has really made my day, and I’m so happy he came up to Boston. I’ll tuck this memory away along with other random moments we have shared and think about this moment at some point in our shared future no doubt.

What does the word family mean and how are our perceptions of the word changing? I looked up the definition and according to Merriam Webster Family has many definitions, but the first two seemed to fit with what I perceive to be traditionally held concepts.

fam·i·ly
Pronunciation: \’fam-lē
Function: noun
1: a group of individuals living under one roof and usually under one head: household
2: a group of persons of common ancestry

The subject has been top of mind lately because a family member has been struggling and the issues this person has been dealing with came to a head on Monday. Fortunately, the family swooped in and was able to provide the support he so badly needed, but it made me sad that I had not spoken up sooner or inserted myself (forcefully if necessary) to get in his face before the situation became so grim. I can only assume he must have been feeling very lonely lately which is sad because we all live so close to each other and genuinely enjoy getting together.

The isolation that comes from feeling alone – truly alone – is difficult to deal with day after day. I can recall those feelings as a teenager and my early 20s. However, I did have a family that was present, and I’m certain that despite feeling distant and alone their presence helped keep me grounded. I would not like to think what might have been my destiny if they were not there. For my relative’s sake, we all need to be a bit more present to help keep him grounded.

Today is my mother’s birthday and I wanted to recognize her. She is one of my absolute favorite people and a personal hero of mine; in addition to being a great Mom.

This morning I drove to Sky Venture New Hampshire in Nashua just off exit 1. The Sky Venture website describes itself as “a new state of the art indoor vertical wind tunnel where you can experience the freedom of flight.” I have been referring to it as a quasi-free fall, because although there is no plane or parachute, you do have the sensation of flying as fans which generate gusts in excess of 100 m.p.h. make you feel light as a feather. Our instructor, Matt, was great and helped each of us steady ourselves, rotate and soar 20+ feet in the air.

My sister, Susan, had previously visited Sky Venture NH and was the best at manipulating the gusts to make the most of her time but even my mother who at the last minute suited up had a great time, despite her fear of falling and heights. For people like me who dislike the cold and can get cabin fever, this is a great weekend activity to try at least once. The drive to Nashua takes about 45 minutes and is absolutely worth it. There are plenty of places to grab a bite or drink after your pseudo-jump to talk and laugh about the experience. We purchased a DVD and if I can figure out how to post it on this site, I’ll be sure to add it later.